Nearly two years after June's death, [Elder Oaks] "felt strong pressure from my daughters, confirmed by my own feeling, that it was time to look for a companion." With that encouragement, he decided to become proactive - to exercise faith by doing. "I went forward to find a wife," he wrote with determination in his journal on July 6, 2000, nearly two years after June's death.

He picked up the phone and called three General Authorities to request that "they watch for eligible and qualified women I could consider." One of those General Authorities, Elder M. Russell Ballard of the Quorum of the Twelve, immediately suggested Kristen M. McMain. Kristen McMain was a 52-year-old educational consultant for a large publisher of K-12 books. She lived in Salt Lake City, but traveled all over the world in her professional assignments. She had two degrees from the University of Utah - Bachelors in English and Masters in Special Education - and a doctoral degree from BYU in curriculum and instruction. She had served a mission in Japan and had never married. As Elder Oaks would later learn, she was a gifted professional teacher and faithful Latter-day Saint.

Even though she spent quality time with her family in Utah and enjoyed her church calling as a gospel doctrine teacher, she still felt her life lacked balance. "Most of my life, energy, and time were going to my employment," she realized. "Concerned and feeling unable to change my life, I asked my bishop for a blessing." Her bishop's unexpected counsel surprised her. "If you do not quit your job," he pronounced in the blessing, "you will have your blessings in the eternities, but not in this life." "When I heard his words," she later wrote, "I felt the truth of them. I had to stop traveling and find employment at home. For a single sister giving up financial security is no easy thing. I had no new job to go to. I had to go on faith to resign from my job."

Over the next few months, she wrote letter after letter of resignation, only to toss them in the trash. "Finally," she said, "I wrote a letter clear enough that no one could doubt my intention to resign. I gave notice and planned to leave on July 1, 2000." Family members, friends, and people at church questioned her judgment, but she had the faith to do what she felt was right.

On the subject of public discourse, we should all follow the gospel teachings to love our neighbor and avoid contention. Followers of Christ should be examples of civility. We should love all people, be good listeners, and show concern for their sincere beliefs. Though we may disagree, we should not be disagreeable. Our stands and communications on controversial topics should not be contentious. We should be wise in explaining and pursuing our positions and in exercising our influence. In doing so, we ask that others not be offended by our sincere religious beliefs and the free exercise of our religion. We encourage all of us to practice the Savior's Golden Rule: "Whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them" (Matthew 7:12).

When our positions do not prevail, we should accept unfavorable results graciously and practice civility with our adversaries. In any event, we should be persons of goodwill toward all, rejecting persecution of any kind, including persecution based on race, ethnicity, religious belief or nonbelief, and differences in sexual orientation. …

As difficult as it is to live in the turmoil surrounding us, our Savior's command to love one another as He loves us is probably our greatest challenge. I pray that we may understand this and seek to live it in all of our relationships and activities.

Why do I speak of such basic truths as the existence of God and the reality of the absolutes of right and wrong that govern our behavior? Sometimes the most needed things we can teach are things we tend to take for granted. We can neglect simple basic truths because we assume they are understood by all, but they are not. We must stress the fundamental truths on which our beliefs are based. Ultimately, these include the existence of God and the eternal reality of the truths and the right and wrong defined by His teachings and His commandments.